Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Pap Smear

OK...after having a baby, a pap smear is not really all that bad.
In fact, I saw it as an exciting opportunity to see my OBGYN, the woman I fell in love with while I was pregnant. She smiled every time we found the baby's heartbeat during those 9 months. And when it was time for me to deliver, there were no stirrups and no bright lights like you see in the movies. She simply sat on the edge of my bed and asked, "remember how to push?"
Today, during the breast exam we discussed the increasing rate of cancer and the topic of few and far between bowel movements. After the vaginal invasion of KY Jelly, cotton swab, and mild cramping, I jumped off the table, grabbed her face in my hands and said, "OK, I can't take it anymore. I miss you so much, let's have another baby."
Then I thought about asking her for a prescription for an anti psychotic.
Instead I left with a prescription for another year of birth control, a maxi pad for the spotting and an insane jealously for all the women in the waiting room with swelling abdomens.
Sigh.

Hormones are dumb.

2 comments:

Gina Ventre said...

Oh yeah. My ovaries have been on pulse recently. I stopped ignoring them and then instructed my body to hold for 3 years. Why do I want a baby in the midst of all this? Who knows. It's not logical.

Anonymous said...

It's totally logical, Ventre. It's your heart reaching out. Building connections. Forging ahead with the new life you are so impatient to step forward through.

As a spinster, I can assure you, the pangs will subside, never going away completely, but they will recede if you take deep breaths.