Everything by Alanis Morissette

To my husband,
Happy Anniversary, yesterday. We spent the day cleaning for the babysitter, otherwise I would have written this yesterday. This song always reminds me of why I am married to you.

I can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it's going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you've never met anyone
Who is as negative as I am sometimes

I know I don't have to convince you of this one. Have you ever met anyone bitchier than me at times? I can say such cutting things, can't I? I like to think that it is because I am good with words, but that is not true. I just know you and know what hurts you most. How do you live with my negativity?

I am the wisest woman you've ever met.
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected.
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen
And you've never met anyone
Who's as positive as I am sometimes.

You once told me that you take care of me because it is my calling to take care of the world. This is when it really hit me that you KNEW me for the person that I so want to be. Thank you for weeding through the ugly stuff that I mentioned above and finding me...humble and hopeful enough to live a life of service.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

I blame everyone else, not my own partaking
My passive-aggressiveness can be devastating

This is where the song diverges. You are always trying to convince me to not feel so guilty, so responsible for the way that other people feel. I am always blaming myself, and you are always there to shoo it away.
Back to the song, I promise I will become less passive-aggressive when I grow up. The thing is...sometimes it is just so damn fun to be that way. I wish I didn't direct it at you so often. For example, when you are on your computer games, I say, "Can you help with the baby or are you SUPER busy right now?" That one is my favorite. I think I will continue to use it for now.

I'm terrified and mistrusting
And you've never met anyone as,
As closed down as I am sometimes.

It is true, it sometimes takes time for me to come clean with how I am feeling. I often do it in the weirdest ways don't I? For example, you could be cooking breakfast (oh yes, thank God you are the family cook) and I will come to you a blubbering mess about something that has been stewing inside of me for months. My timing stinks. You always stop dead in your tracks (and feed me eggs) and listen, though. The thing is, you accept everything that I have to say.

What I resist, persists, and speaks louder than I know
What I resist, you love, no matter how low or high I go

There are so many things that you have watched me go through that we have both not been proud of. You wait patiently for me to come to you for help, and there you are, with a fresh gift of support.
I love the space that we allow to exist between us. We each have interests in things that the other could care less about. To realize this and to let it happen is so healthy. Except for your undying love for war computer games, I could do without that one.

I'm the funniest woman that you've ever known
I'm the dullest woman that you've ever known
I'm the most gorgeous woman that you've ever known
And you've never met anyone
Who is as everything as I am sometimes

Admit it, I make you laugh. I make you laugh more than I bore you, don't I?

You have told me that I was beautiful from the day we had our first conversation in high school, on the day that we got married, on the day that the scale almost hit 200 lbs. right before I gave birth to our daughter, and every single day in between. You have no idea what a gift this is.

You see everything,you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

I am not capable of falling out of love with you.
I thank you for another year of bliss.