Thursday, September 27, 2007

Amazon Purchase Update

I know, I know...SO MANY of you are waiting to hear about the herbal colon cleanse I purchased weeks ago. It is called Oxypowder and it has done everything that it has promised.
Let me use this disclaimer: In order to endure a colon cleanse, you must be the type of person obsessed about what goes in your mouth and what comes out the other end. This means that you must be nuttier than a health nut. This means that the words "fasting" and "colonic" do not make you twist your face up and scoff.

(To my dear friend who is rolling his eyes right now: Yes, that used to be me. Yes, you were right about everything. Yes, if only I had listened to you 10 years ago I would not have had to see 10 years of impacted colon stuff in the toilet).

So what can I say without disgusting all of you?
I love Oxypowder:
Goodbye last few baby pounds!
Goodbye acne!
Goodbye constipation!
Goodbye bloating!
Goodbye self-respect!

2 comments:

Gina Ventre said...

have you watched the Penn and Teller Bullshit show about colonics? Interesting.

I can't fast and you can tell by looking at me. I can't even fast during 2 hours of lit class. I ate a banana and an apple in there this morning. I wanted a McMuffin.

Keep in mind that your system is designed to do all that at its' own pace. Beware a possible lack of intestinal fortitude!

Anonymous said...

I can't fast either. I'm right there with Gina. I applaude your efforts though. You are a stronger woman than I.

A friend did a sort of natural cleansing thing recently. Just juice and tea and some health drink thing for the weekend. She was pretty lightheaded by Sunday afternoon, but felt better overall after the whole process was done.